Reproduction vs. Debt Reduction

Last night, a representative from Citi called us at 8:15pm and didn't hang up.  I arrived home to a calm husband, having a rational conversation with someone on the phone.  I thought it was his mom, but no, it was 'Home Owner's Assistance Dept'.  Here is what I heard my husband saying on the phone,

Well, it seems that you guys have the ability to help us figure out a modification, or principle reduction, so what ever happens next, it is up to you.

What a change, not our calm-ness, but the person on the phone was seemingly helpful.  They did transfer him a few times, but in the end, there were more results when they call you, and not vice versa. If you call them, they can not help you.  If you call them and are paying your mortgage, they really can not help you.  Waiting for them to call you is hard.

We have now submitted a loan modification form that will help us be assigned a 'mortgage counselor', even though the modification they have in mind is useless to us.  This is help from the inside, instead of David cracking the egg of Goliath from the outside. Maybe they will be more helpful if there is one person, who is not haggard from the 4 million stories of despair and suffering from the borrowers.  I can pay my mortgage, so I can be calm and at ease on the phone, but many are jobless, have children dying of cancer, as well as losing their homes.  I can see that the gatekeepers at Citimortgage have to be callused individuals, and continue everyday with gate-keeping.  What a tough job!

The mystery of the mortgage industry, is much like the mystery of reproduction.  It is a learning process that, though shrouded in mystery, can end in understanding (and pain).  Though human reproduction is mysterious and miraculous, the mortgage industry is just expansive and mysterious.  In that way, the similarities end.

When I was very young, I was very confused about sex and reproduction.  I was clueless to its existence.  It was as if my mom just kept bringing home new people to live with us, and I had no idea how it was happening.  As I grew older, I learned more about the world and realized how a baby made its way into the world: it came out of women's belly-buttons (who didn't think that was how it worked for just a minute or two?).

As I grew even older, I became informed via the usual pubescent ways (I won't explain, my mom reads this).  Then I got married, and learned more, culminating at 23 years old,  and the moment my son was born.  At that point, I'd come a long way from the pre-schooler I was 20 years beforehand.

As I have been negotiating with Citimortgage, I have determined my understanding of the situation is nearly like my understanding of human sexuality and reproduction (though less rewarding and fun by a LONG stretch).  It is something to be learned about by experience, and from the inside-out.

I think that I might be age 6 in my development, having just learned that there is such a thing as a mortgage company, and suspicious there is more too it than I thought, just a few years ago.

The Details of Hope

Here are some details that we have to consider as the federal government continues to try to bail out the real estate market.

Some of the programs may apply to us.  Making Homes Affordable is a program that our lender is participating in.  We could lower our monthly payment to 31% of our income.  We were not crazy when we bought this house, and spend 32% (still in my opinion, high, but it was what a house cost).  Citi offered to lower our payment through refinancing by 1% of our monthly income, saving us close to nothing over the lifetime of our loan, as they were also willing to charge the going rate for a refi.  In several years we could have recouped the cost of modifying our loan using Make Homes Affordable, which in the end, doesn't really make our house any more affordable.

So far, the Make Homes Affordable project has helped 170,000 home owners.  This is wonderful news for those home owners.  The project was anticipated to be viable for 3-4 MILLION home owners initially.  People with more expertise than me, are estimating that 5% of the 3 millions folks will actually get a loan modification using this program.  I actually could be one of those 170,000 homeowners, but it wasn't a savings for us.

This is why last week I was a bit excited about new programs being formed to help even more underwater and unemployed home owners.  There are many details.  The main deal is that we would need to get current to salvage our credit score.  In the case that we did get current, our principle could be reduced 15% per year we have been paying.  This is equal to the dive the market took.  It would make our house affordable.

After the excitement of the new announcement wore off, I started thinking.  Which federal assistance program adopted in the last 2 years has been really effective?  Which one has offered real assistance to me, my neighbors, small businesses, corporations, the stock market, etc.  If we were able to participate, or our lender is participating, the only difference between a federally funded principle reduction and a short-sale, would be my credit score, the taxes owed to the state of California, and my proximity.  Are those things that I want to leave in the hands of the government and the lender?  Do I really want to wait and hope on these institutions to resolve the situation?

For now, my answer is no.  I'll jump through their hoops if they put them out for me, but the track record is pretty bad.

Beauty and the Beast: The Last Rose Petal

I got a rose as a gift several years ago.  I put it in a pot, and not the ground because I have trouble committing.  It blooms dozens of tiny brilliant roses.  Some summers I can get it to bloom twice.  Early this year I moved it indoors to our garden room.  It pushed out, and then thousands of aphids attacked.  I started killing those little killers with glycerine, and soap, and bodily pulling them off.  There were too many to get rid of, and the photo you see proves it.  They really devastated the whole plant (it is not exactly dead).  I put a lot of time and effort into what was once a beautiful plant.

I have another rose nearby, and it is pest-free, and blooming.  Asking advice from a friend, he said something that I had forgotten in my forceful attempt to kill the pests.  If aphids are only attacking one plant, then the plant is compromised in some other way and the bugs are just responding.  Another example is the lion killing the sick wildebeest, and the  healthy ones escape.  It seems a natural order.  For some reason I thought I was independent from the natural order.

My friend's advice gave me permission to take the rose out of the pot, and put a healthy one in.  My usual way, is to work, and work, and work, even if the results are bad.  Sometimes I can do this ad nauseam.  I also need to point out, that some things are worth working yourself to death for, but most are not.  I am learning the difference.

When I took the rose out and looked carefully, the roots were moldy.  I could have continued on my path, but in the end the pests weren't the problem.  I pruned the rose back to the quick, dug it a new hole, filled it with compost, and put the plant in the readied hole.  It was 5 times easier than picking off the aphids one-by-one.  It still may not survive, but at least it has some chance. 

In relation to my mortgage and housing situation:

If I do nothing but what I'm doing until I'm 60 I'll own this house.  Though things are excellent now, life is dynamic.  If ANYTHING changes for us we will be stuck tending what was once a beautiful thing.  By 'stuck', I  mean trapped.  I doubt  my life will continue on just as it is for the next 30 years.  Let's look at some reasonable scenarios that I am stuck with in case of life altering events, such as moving, job changes, home upkeep and repair,  illness, college tuition, California falling into the Pacific ( I threw that last one in to see if you were paying attention).  If the real-estate market had continued to be a profitable venture after we bought our house, none of these would influence us so radically.  Just imagine:

I might have to move in the next 30 years before I have paid off my house, but alas, I would not be willing.  If we did move we would have to pay for this house, and pay to live in another, because I would NEVER sell this house for a profit.  I would never sell my house and give the lender the difference.  

I would be so opposed to selling short or foreclosing that I would pay no matter what.  I would be so opposed to paying for 2 houses, that I would never move, and I would pressure my husband to make a huge salary, or find a bad job at high pay, even if he is miserable, so that I would not have to sell short or move.  

I could lay awake at night and worry about my young handsome husband dying early.  Not because I love him dearly and would miss his pun-ny jokes, but because without his salary, I could not live in this house.  Because of when we bought our house, we have to live in this house.  

I could imagine myself getting a job teaching school to make the mortgage at all costs, and then I think of more that 20,000 more qualified teachers than myself, being laid off by the state of California just this month.  Every one of those teachers has a story just like mine, they have a family, and a mortgage too!  Even if I did get a teaching job, and I have this modest house, a teacher salary would not pay the mortgage.  I could get a job in another field, but I have no skills, as I have been tending to my children for the last 10 years, so I would have to go to a University.  We don't have a university in our town (which I HAVE to live in) and I have maxed out my community college credit limit, so I would have to drive to Sacramento, or do classes on line.  That is do-able, but not when the first of the month just keeps coming, my husband is miserable, my kids are nearing high school graduation and college tuition themselves.

I have had to change.  I have had to stop pushing ahead without results.  I have had to stop feeling under the influence of hard economic times, as a victim.  I have had to stop actually caring about what everyone thinks.  I've stopped worrying (for the most part) that people will see my 'pests', and in the end the plant will die regardless of my actions.  I have had to stop being distracted by the symptoms of the problem, and reviewed the cause.  As it turns out, I have little influence on both.

I guess I have decided not to do that to myself, and my family.  I choose not to be trapped when I can, not to be afraid, and not wait for that last petal to fall off a dying rosebush.  I choose to love my husband for who he is, not for what he can do for me.  I know that terrible things will happen to me in-which I have no choice.  I choose for my house not to be one of them.  I think now is the time for damage control.